Hospital, hospital, hospital

Today. is exactly 12 weeks since I had my stroke. It is so strange, it feels so long ago, but has gone so quickly! I look back and feel proud of how far I have come, but also look forward and realise there is still a long way to go! Life is most definitely taking me on a journey of experiences and I fully intend on embracing all of them! The highs and the lows!

Speaking of experiences, check out my rather fetching heart monitor and matching pouch! Sexy, huh? Last week I had a 7 day ECG monitor fitted. It wasn't my best ever accessory but I can also tell you it wasn't my worst either! As a child in the 80's and early 90's I must say the large, round, multi-coloured specs my Mum made me wear, still rank at number 1! Cheers Mum, although, she still defends "they were the fashion!"

This morning I had the immense satisfaction of taking that bad boy off and handing it back to the Cardiac Department...which may I add is a bloody long trek through the hospital. Most definitely an ill placed department considering that most of the people who have to get there probably have a dodgy ticker!

After my morning visit, and after lunch, it was back to Basildon hospital for my 2nd visit of the day. This time the Breast Care Clinic! I have to go every year for screening due to family history of Breast Cancer.

Back in November 1991 at the age of 42, my Mum decided to go for a Breast reduction, after the operation an appointment was made for her to go back 3 weeks later.

So, with her perky new friends and a follow-up appointment made, she traveled back home from London. After 3 weeks of admiring her new figure, she went back feeling so happy and with no clue that the world she was currently on top of, was about to come crashing down!

"There's no easy way to tell you this! So I am just going to tell you!" the doctor at the follow-up appointment did not look as pleased as my Mum did! He carried on "During the operation I sliced through a mass, deep in the breast tissue. I removed the whole mass and sent it away for testing! We have been trying to get hold of you for 3 weeks! I am very sorry, you have Breast Cancer!"

4 words! That's all it took! My Mum went through so many tests and a Mastectomy and has been Cancer free for over 24 years now and still going strong!

In 2012 one of my sisters was in between her yearly screening appointments when she found a lump! And again she heard the words those horrific 4 words that no one wants to hear! Sadly she was not as lucky. In February last year, she got her angel wings and I am positive she is up there looking over people and protecting them! So since my Mum and sister have both had cancer me and other sister now have yearly screening.

At this point I have to stress, even if you are in your 20's and think you're too young. Or if you have yearly screening... Check your boobies!!! Get to know them, get to know how they feel and look. Don't just look for a lump... look for changes! The more you check, the more you will notice when something is not right for your body! And secondly, don't wait! Don't wait to see if it changes again, goes away or gets worse!

What to check for

So, after having the wonderful Dr 'Boob' having a good check of the girls I was free to go for another year. (But still checking in the shower & mirror monthly)

Next week I am free of hospital appointments, but only for next week. Monday 1st I am back for a Renal appointment. Next week I shall be enjoying catching up with some friends and a lovely cuppa!

My Introduction

I am a wife and a mother of two very... shall we say, energetic boys. I was also, until recently, a self-employed Childminder. About 3 years ago I had a scare with my Kidneys, I have always had problems and knew I would need a transplant one day.. I thought I was looking at a good 30-40 years. Thankfully, my scare was just that, a scare. But it had made me aware that 30-40 years was more like 10-15 years.

Since then my kidneys have been on a steady decline, right now, I am looking at 2-5 years! But I am okay with that now. The way I see it, I am in the best position I can be. I know about it! Most people don't know they have a Kidney problem until they are practically failing and facing dialysis. I have always known about my Kidneys so I have had chance to get my head round it all. Although still, at times, I get quite scared!

I started my Childminding business in August 2011 and all was going well until I had my little wobble in 2013! I knew then that Childminding would not be an option forever, so I set out looking for other business ideas. I am a very creative person and love to make anything! I have made real cakes, nappy cakes, wooden plaques, keepsake boxes, photo albums, cake pops, wooden picture transfers... I will try my hand at most things. 

In 2014 I was introduced to an MLM business and I can tell you now, what I said about the business, I shall not repeat! After a few months I decided to bite the bullet and give it a go... As I said, I will try my hand at anything. The business was not easy... but I loved it! 

It wasn't just about money, it was about helping people, building them up, giving people things that money cannot buy. Belief. Confidence. Strength, Courage and most of all, friendship! A huge part of the business is personal development. Something I hadn't really heard of or fully understood. 

One of the first books I was encouraged to read was Jack Canfield, How To Get From Where You Are To here You Want To Be.  It was incredible, they said just read 10 pages a day, well, I took my book to Cornwall and was totally hooked! 

The reason this book has been so important to me, is because at the time it wasn't. It was only later on, when I started to to put it in to practice did I realise how important it was. It talks about talking responsibility for everything that happens to you. It explains that the event, whatever that may be, will always be the event. The death of someone, rain at a picnic, traffic jam, health issue... I am sure you get the picture. So, the event is always the event, the only variable is you! How you react to that event, that's how to determine the outcome. 

The reason this book has been so important, came to light in October 2015! Thursday 29th was half-term, I had my own two children and two childminding children with. W were at my Mother-in-Law's house, who was also a childminder, having a children's Halloween party. 

All of a sudden I felt peculiar, and ended up on the floor. Luckily I was with quick thinking family who called an ambulance. Everything is a bit vague, like trying to remember a dream. I could not move the entire right side of my body! 

I was taken to A&E and remember being terrified that I was going to die and feeling devastated that I hadn't given my children one last hug, one last kiss, told them I loved them one last time. Even now, typing this, I get a lump in my throat! I was admitted to hospital and told I'd had a stroke!

My family were all understandably concerned and upset. But me? After the initial shock, I was actually okay with it! I had Jack Canfield's book in my head! My take on the situation... Yes, I had a stroke, there was nothing I could do to change that! It had happened, all I could do now was deal with it.No whinging, moaning no woe is me! I realised quickly that the outcome was purely down to me!

I was so determined to get out and be with my family. I pushed myself everyday and told the Doctors I wanted to be out by Friday 6th November to surprise my kids and be there at the school gates! 8 Days  after my stroke!

8 days later, I walked out of hospital! Very slowly and tentative, but I was walking! It has now been almost 12 weeks since my stroke and I am improving everyday! It might sound so strange and of course a stroke is not a good thing to have, but it has made me a stronger and more positive person! It was something that was out of my control, the only thing I could control was my attitude and that has been down to the personal development I have done and will continue to do.

My Kidneys are still holding up, just and I am undergoing loads of tests to find out why I had the stroke. My journey is far from over. But I know now that I can and will handle anything! There will be challenges and very tough roads ahead, I cannot control that, but I can control how I deal with it all, head on and with  positivity!

So, that's me! I want to write about my journey, share all the experience and the lessons I learn along the way.